Thursday, March 31, 2005
Expanding Aggregate Sales Towards Selected Target Markets
We have a responsibiliy to improve the lot of small businesses, in order to create a thriving economy and stimulate competitive growth in hitherto neglected market sectors. Call me a stickler for progressive fiscal management, I don't care.
Bronnt Industries Kapital fully endorses this product or service
Music: Throbbing Gristle
Friday, March 18, 2005
The New Wave of Shut the Fuck Up
Are you in a New Wave Band? Angular riffs? Skinny ties? Attitude? A nod to the past with a wry eye on the future? Into Gang of Four?
You need a New Wave Band Name.
For only £65 we can provide you wth a cutting edge band name that hits home and gets you noticed FAST.
Here is a list of exactly the kind of names that A+R men are looking for.
These names have been registered with the Band Name Directory, but can be purchased from us for only £65! And what's more, major label A+R have ALREADY BEEN NOTIFIED of these band names and ARE JUST DYING TO HEAR YOUR BAND. THESE ARE 100% CERTIFIED BUZZ BAND NAMES.
Just choose from the list below and email us now! Don't delay! Your chance to be a BUZZ BAND is only moments away!
Heat Wave Monroe
The Flick Knives
Turkey Shoot
The Thirst
The Buzz
The Now
The Trophy Wives
The Sunset Strips
The Nylon Gems
The Satin Razors
The Tellers
The Cliffnotes
The Pocket Knives
The Bone Sharks
The New Waveforms
The Glaives
The Agents
5 Card Studs
The Pocket Rockets
The Speed Kings
You need a New Wave Band Name.
For only £65 we can provide you wth a cutting edge band name that hits home and gets you noticed FAST.
Here is a list of exactly the kind of names that A+R men are looking for.
These names have been registered with the Band Name Directory, but can be purchased from us for only £65! And what's more, major label A+R have ALREADY BEEN NOTIFIED of these band names and ARE JUST DYING TO HEAR YOUR BAND. THESE ARE 100% CERTIFIED BUZZ BAND NAMES.
Just choose from the list below and email us now! Don't delay! Your chance to be a BUZZ BAND is only moments away!
Heat Wave Monroe
The Flick Knives
Turkey Shoot
The Thirst
The Buzz
The Now
The Trophy Wives
The Sunset Strips
The Nylon Gems
The Satin Razors
The Tellers
The Cliffnotes
The Pocket Knives
The Bone Sharks
The New Waveforms
The Glaives
The Agents
5 Card Studs
The Pocket Rockets
The Speed Kings
Moods for Moderns
Music: Talk Talk - Spirit of Eden
Mood: Modern
I've been finding pool to be an uncommonly good way to relax and enjoy the convivial company of friends. It also stops me thinking about flaying people alive.
The pub next door to me is relaxed and friendly, but the pool table is shit and the drinks expensive. The jukebox is alright. The other day I watched a man fall off his stool and piss himself. This man was the publican. He disappeared into the toilet for a long time, and then we had to leave as the stench of shit was overwhelming.
The Elbow Rooms on Park Street has good tables but they are too close to the walls. It is also expensive, pretentious and thus turns my thoughts back to flaying people alive.
Riley's Snooker Club on the Triangle has professional tables. I am unsure of the prices, but I am aware that they play pop music at quite loud volumes. I was listening to pop when I flayed that social worker, so I am of the understanding that it is best for me to avoid pop.
From forum thread - "Recording Live - Which Approach is Best?"
It is my view that the live approach is over-used, and received without argument.
Surely the most authentic way to record your songs is to DI everything into a PC, then put the parts into a wave to MIDI convertor program. You will then have MIDI files of the separate tracks. Next, buy a really big multitimbral MIDI Workstation keyboard, like a Korg Triton or something. It doesn't matter what the make is, just make sure it's really big. Program your MIDI files into, and arrange the parts using General MIDI sounds. GM sounds have been selected and calibrated to enable the listener to hear every nuance of the arrangement. Next, mix it down with plenty of digital chorus and flange. Maybe go for some sort of Aural Exciter and Vocoder on the vocal. If the drums still sound too 'roomy' and 'live', try compressing them more, then gate them or edit out all the decay.
When your track is finished, send it to Future Music for a review. Put some fractals on the cover or something.
Mood: Modern
I've been finding pool to be an uncommonly good way to relax and enjoy the convivial company of friends. It also stops me thinking about flaying people alive.
The pub next door to me is relaxed and friendly, but the pool table is shit and the drinks expensive. The jukebox is alright. The other day I watched a man fall off his stool and piss himself. This man was the publican. He disappeared into the toilet for a long time, and then we had to leave as the stench of shit was overwhelming.
The Elbow Rooms on Park Street has good tables but they are too close to the walls. It is also expensive, pretentious and thus turns my thoughts back to flaying people alive.
Riley's Snooker Club on the Triangle has professional tables. I am unsure of the prices, but I am aware that they play pop music at quite loud volumes. I was listening to pop when I flayed that social worker, so I am of the understanding that it is best for me to avoid pop.
From forum thread - "Recording Live - Which Approach is Best?"
It is my view that the live approach is over-used, and received without argument.
Surely the most authentic way to record your songs is to DI everything into a PC, then put the parts into a wave to MIDI convertor program. You will then have MIDI files of the separate tracks. Next, buy a really big multitimbral MIDI Workstation keyboard, like a Korg Triton or something. It doesn't matter what the make is, just make sure it's really big. Program your MIDI files into, and arrange the parts using General MIDI sounds. GM sounds have been selected and calibrated to enable the listener to hear every nuance of the arrangement. Next, mix it down with plenty of digital chorus and flange. Maybe go for some sort of Aural Exciter and Vocoder on the vocal. If the drums still sound too 'roomy' and 'live', try compressing them more, then gate them or edit out all the decay.
When your track is finished, send it to Future Music for a review. Put some fractals on the cover or something.
Monday, March 14, 2005
stop touching my face
Music: 'Stop Touching My Cat - A Collection of Remixes and Cover Versions of Songs by SJ Esau' - S J Esau, Mole Harness, Why?, Twocsinak, Freeze Puppy, Bedridden Kids, Id lab, Bronnt Industries Kapital, Audio Whore, My Ambulance Is On Fire, Countryside Alliance, Rarg, The Gonorrorhoeas, Wafffffffles + SJ Esau + Arwin + Sung + Delphine + Pato + Assis + James + Pippin, Dady Cool Cool Chappel Face.
Mood: none
Recently the following things happened.
* Bronnt Industries Kapital played in Amsterdam with Knowledge of Bugs and Tunng and Mica P. Hinson.
* Gravenhurst played in Bristol with Male and in London at the Camden Crawl.
* I updated the Bronnt and Gravenhurst sites, a bit.
* I bought a pedalboard.
* Part of my hand turned into glass
Mood: none
Recently the following things happened.
* Bronnt Industries Kapital played in Amsterdam with Knowledge of Bugs and Tunng and Mica P. Hinson.
* Gravenhurst played in Bristol with Male and in London at the Camden Crawl.
* I updated the Bronnt and Gravenhurst sites, a bit.
* I bought a pedalboard.
* Part of my hand turned into glass
Friday, February 25, 2005
you watch as I destroy your face
Mood: speechless
Music: Broadcast - Hah Hah Sound
I've lost my fucking voice. Like, laryngitis stylee. Played a gig with a cold the other night in a smoky venue in Bristol. Gig = success. Throat = cunted.
On the basis of some poor inductive reasoning, I can only assume my voice will never return, that i'll have nodes on my larynx, i'll never be able to sing agin, and that will be the end of my career in music. See you down the temp agency.
Or maybe i'll just make instrumental drug music like Sonic Boom.
Music: Broadcast - Hah Hah Sound
I've lost my fucking voice. Like, laryngitis stylee. Played a gig with a cold the other night in a smoky venue in Bristol. Gig = success. Throat = cunted.
On the basis of some poor inductive reasoning, I can only assume my voice will never return, that i'll have nodes on my larynx, i'll never be able to sing agin, and that will be the end of my career in music. See you down the temp agency.
Or maybe i'll just make instrumental drug music like Sonic Boom.
Tuesday, February 22, 2005
i smell burning
WTF?! http://www.petsnap.com/menu-nav/dstrollerSBC1.htm
Mood: I have lost my voice
Music: Talk Talk - Laughing Stock
Last night we played our first gig since November at the Croft, Bristol. It was dead, dead good.
I was asked to write a bit about recording in the studio for The Fly. Here is what I wrote.
The studio is Toybox in Bristol, http://www.toyboxstudios.co.uk. It's run by Ali Chant, Stef Hambrook and the producer and musician John Parish. Howe Gelb, Scout Nibblet and Kid Carpet are among the artists who have made records there. Toybox is situated in a Georgian townhouse in leafy Portland Square. The studio has an abandoned lift shaft which makes a great reverb chamber, and is haunted by the ghost of a horse, as it used to be the stables of the building above. The horse was hanged for a crime it didn't commit in 1888, and its restless spirit now wanders the square in limbo. I saw the horse in the control room after drinking a bottle of cough syrup.
Mood: I have lost my voice
Music: Talk Talk - Laughing Stock
Last night we played our first gig since November at the Croft, Bristol. It was dead, dead good.
I was asked to write a bit about recording in the studio for The Fly. Here is what I wrote.
The studio is Toybox in Bristol, http://www.toyboxstudios.co.uk. It's run by Ali Chant, Stef Hambrook and the producer and musician John Parish. Howe Gelb, Scout Nibblet and Kid Carpet are among the artists who have made records there. Toybox is situated in a Georgian townhouse in leafy Portland Square. The studio has an abandoned lift shaft which makes a great reverb chamber, and is haunted by the ghost of a horse, as it used to be the stables of the building above. The horse was hanged for a crime it didn't commit in 1888, and its restless spirit now wanders the square in limbo. I saw the horse in the control room after drinking a bottle of cough syrup.
Tuesday, February 15, 2005
Dreadful Crows
Mood: granular synthesis
Today my world was rocked by:
arc in round - Disco Inferno
the butterfly collector - ARKane
fortune teller - Sugar
percy's song - Fairport Convention
aguirre - Popol Vuh
pink turns to blue - Husker Du
just to play - Midnight Movies
where Iike to stand - Vashti Bunyan
jenny Was A friend of Mine - The Killers
popul vuh I - Flying Saucer Attack
beyond Belief - Elvis Costello
christine - The House of Love
Stupid idea: http://www.bbspot.com/News/2005/02/ban_urban_legends.html
Genius: http://www.enginecomics.co.uk/interviews/jan05/alanmoore.htm
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Making some real headway with the comic book, which we have decided to name Ultraskull.
Mr William Schaff has decided to risk his artistic credibility by donating a piece for the front cover of our shitty little rag.
Today my world was rocked by:
arc in round - Disco Inferno
the butterfly collector - ARKane
fortune teller - Sugar
percy's song - Fairport Convention
aguirre - Popol Vuh
pink turns to blue - Husker Du
just to play - Midnight Movies
where Iike to stand - Vashti Bunyan
jenny Was A friend of Mine - The Killers
popul vuh I - Flying Saucer Attack
beyond Belief - Elvis Costello
christine - The House of Love
Stupid idea: http://www.bbspot.com/News/2005/02/ban_urban_legends.html
Genius: http://www.enginecomics.co.uk/interviews/jan05/alanmoore.htm
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Making some real headway with the comic book, which we have decided to name Ultraskull.
Mr William Schaff has decided to risk his artistic credibility by donating a piece for the front cover of our shitty little rag.
Friday, February 11, 2005
Wednesday, February 02, 2005
[:]
Mood: unemployed rat-catcher
Music: Crescent - Collected Songs
Unbelievable quote of the day: "Any man who rides a bus to work after the age of 30 can count himself a failure in life". - Margaret Thatcher
Super fun link of the day: http://www.kleimo.com/random/name.cfm
Trying to organise a few Bristol shows before the Camden Crawl in march. Not much else to say other than that I am reading The Real Middle Earth, by Brian Bates, an exploration of Dark Ages Britain, the inspiration for Tolkien's Middle Earth, and it's fascinating.
Music: Crescent - Collected Songs
Unbelievable quote of the day: "Any man who rides a bus to work after the age of 30 can count himself a failure in life". - Margaret Thatcher
Super fun link of the day: http://www.kleimo.com/random/name.cfm
Trying to organise a few Bristol shows before the Camden Crawl in march. Not much else to say other than that I am reading The Real Middle Earth, by Brian Bates, an exploration of Dark Ages Britain, the inspiration for Tolkien's Middle Earth, and it's fascinating.
Monday, January 31, 2005
celebrity bowel sprayer
mood: Les paul
music: me playing a Les Paul really loud through an amplifier the size of a cigarette packet
Super fun link of the day: http://www.landoverbaptist.org/
Critical reappraisal time
I tell you what, right? Frank Miller's The Dark Knight Returns is an overrated crock of shit. If bad artwork, a dearth of sympathetic characters and an unconvincing script filled with irritating street-lingo makes a seminal work of comic art, constantly referred to in the same breath as Alan Moore's peerless Watchmen, then I'm Lionel fucking Ritchie.
I got his Ronin for Xmas (Miller's, not Richie's, though I suspect Richie's is the superior work). It had better be good.
My friend Andrew actually sat through the Punisher movie. Here is his review:
music: me playing a Les Paul really loud through an amplifier the size of a cigarette packet
Super fun link of the day: http://www.landoverbaptist.org/
Critical reappraisal time
I tell you what, right? Frank Miller's The Dark Knight Returns is an overrated crock of shit. If bad artwork, a dearth of sympathetic characters and an unconvincing script filled with irritating street-lingo makes a seminal work of comic art, constantly referred to in the same breath as Alan Moore's peerless Watchmen, then I'm Lionel fucking Ritchie.
I got his Ronin for Xmas (Miller's, not Richie's, though I suspect Richie's is the superior work). It had better be good.
My friend Andrew actually sat through the Punisher movie. Here is his review:
Punisher the movie. A review by Andrew Barkham.
"Beautifully paced by director Jon Hensleigh and his editing team, storylines from various Punisher incarnations are skilfully weaved into a comprehensive whole. The dialogue crackles with wit and intelligence and each revelatory plot twist draws you deeper into the action. Thomas Jane is Frank Castle incarnate and must surely be destined for greatness. Best of all, John Travolta displays his true professionalism by attacking his role with the same enthusiasm and intensity he brought to Pulp Fiction and Get Shorty. Marvel can rest assured that the integrity of one of its most popular characters has been upheld."
I'm sure you can detect the sarcasm.
I'm sure you can detect the sarcasm.
Critical reappraisal time part II
I tell you what, right? Sergio Leone's Once Upon a Time in America is an overrated crock of shit. The contrived plot revolves around an unlikeable group of mysoginist thugs, with the odd woman portrayed as a either a whore or a pricktease. The pace is Lucio Fulci porridge without the recurring scenes of ocular trauma to reward one's patience. In the bathroom I found an interesting stain on the wall and didn't come out for twenty minutes, by which time the film was over. Apparently James Woods throws himself into a furnace in the end, so it sounds like I missed the consolation prize.
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